lotz
2004-03-29, 11:47 p.m.
heyz.
it's been some time since i've last updated ehz..it's one of those..so much have happened, but nothing to pinpoint on to talk about..
i don't know whether she'll read this. but i'll write it in anyway..firstly..comtemptous? who's the one fuming away? i hate to argue about something so personal. that's why i haven't approached you. well..then again..think whatever you like..guess..i'm too tired to bother much about it. and oh ya, what happened at the studio..it wasn't personal, didn't quite realize you'd take it that way. i juz wanted time on my own. i still am quite a solitary person.
speaking of tired. i'm really tired..i live life for the sake of it. i almost no longer find any meaning in everything..much as i can delude myself into believing there is..there come times when it's clear there isn't any..when everything arounds you slam right into you. screaming, this is reality. this is where and what you're living in. it's painful. i mean..slam. ow. i never let my walls drop till i'm alone..those time of solitude, facade drops smoothly like silk, no interruptions..it's pure bliss.
for her..knowing that you're found true friends..i'm glad for you..really. i do know what it feels like to find friends who have the same likings as you..to feel that you can confide in them..they don't come often..as they always say.
starring at this bright screen at this hour of the night..i feel wasted. life drained. leaving me with nothing but a mortal, physical body. what have i done the whole of today? i don't know..i don't remember..they don't matter. could i have spent the time on more productive things? yes. but would they be more memorable? i doubt it. last question. what am i rambling on about? i'd no idea.
love, Sapph
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